At Least Holcomb Got Rid of the Ball

I’m not going to talk about the Browns too much because I don’t want to throw up. I don’t think that they are the worst team in the NFL. I do think that they have one of the worst offenses in the NFL. The defense has played their butts off. They’re ranked 8th in the NFL in points allowed (17.4pg), but the offense is treating them like Roger Clemens. Rueben Droughns is showing that he is a good back, but Trent Dilfer needs to get his act together. He looks shaky at best. He’s holding onto the ball as long as Tim Couch did, and we know how that ended.

Omar Jacobs missed this week’s game against Akron. No problem, right? WRONG. BG lost at home to fucking Akron. Clearly Omar is more important to this offense than the offense is to Omar. Anthony Turner wasn’t bad, but he needs to get the ball to Sharon and Sanders. They combined for less than 100 yards receiving. Not what you want from two all-conference receivers.

Ohio State dominated Minnesota in the second half Saturday. I was a little worried when it was tied at 21 at the half. But then I remembered that playing in the Metrodome is no home field advantage. That combined with Maroney running for 14 yards in the second half pretty much doomed Minnesota.

(Side-note here, Animal from the Road Warriors son is a true frosh linebacker for the Bucks this year. He was Mr. Football in Minnesota last year but shunned Glenn Mason because he wanted to go to a school with a great linebacker tradition. I read that his dad got him an Andy Katzenmoyer jersey when he was younger, who would have thought Andy would ever come back to help the Bucks?)

Florida got a big boost from their defense against Georgia on Saturday. They got good pressure on Joe T. and never let UGA’s running game get going. They got just enough help from the offense. But if you’re the defense wouldn’t you want the offense to score their 14 points in the first quarter like they did? It’s always easier to play from ahead.

I laughed when South Carolina beat Tennessee Saturday. Does Fat Phil hate anyone more than Spurrier? When asked whether taking USC into Knoxville worried him, Spurrier asked why would it? He went in there with Duke and won. That’s great. Classic Spurrier playing mind games with the Orange-necks.

There’s only one reason that I wish I were still at my old job: the downfall of the Minnesota Vikings. It’s my favorite storyline of the season.

My flag football team lost 20-14 Saturday. We did outscore the Giants 14-12 in the second half. My spread defense worked in that the kids found the ball better, but it didn’t help them grab the flags. We did score on plays of 70 and 35 yards though. The latter on the last play of the game; a great QB naked boot call on my part.

New Philadelphia High School beat Dover High Friday night in the 101st all-time meeting. The local radio station simulcast the game online. I was really impressed. Dover runs a spread attack and Philly held them in check. NP was down 21-14 at half, but rallied and kicked the game winning field goal with 30 seconds left. Final, 31-28. That was NP’s first win at Dover since 1991 and their first back-to-back wins since I think 1992.

My boss just left so that is my cue to cut out of here as well. I’ve actually started working out again so I have to get to the gym so I can get home and hand out candy.

Later bitches.

Big Game Coach

As I said yesterday I am the assistant coach for a youth flag football team. That was until last night when I found out for the second time this season I will take the reins because our head coach will be out of town on business. Now the last time this happened we were playing the best team in the league. We only lost 14-7 and managed to score our first touchdown of the season on the last play of the game. That was also one of the only two times this season that our defense has made a stop. Grant it the end of the half helped, but the way my defense plays I’ll take it.

The team we’re playing tomorrow is the only one in the league that we match up with favorably. We should have beat them the last time we played but their best player showed up at halftime and scored two TDs in the second half. The other two teams in the league just beat us up. Even though we gave the Chargers a game last week, they have a 10 year old and an 8 year old on their team. This is supposed to be a 5-7 league. What a crooked town. And the other team, the Tigers, are stacked because the former Parks and Rec Director’s grandson plays for them so pretty much every great athlete in the league is on that team. And people wonder what’s wrong with youth sports in America.

Here’s the game plan: we’re going to run the hell out of the reverse play I put in last week that we scored two TDs on and we’re going to use my new “spread defense.” I have a really good feeling about this game.

They’re building a BW3 in this two-horse town. It’s not supposed to open until the spring, but it gives me a glimmering of hope. After I hire some hard drinking interns in Dallas at the Winter Meetings I have a feeling that I will be spending a lot of time at this new establishment.

New Philadelphia High School plays Dover High tonight for the 101st time. New Philadelphia is my alma mater. They’re riding into this game at 8-1, Dover’s 7-2 but undefeated in the league. So this game has a share of the league title on the line, a possible home playoff game, and pride. NP has a one game lead in the all-time series. Last year we won the game for the first time since 1994, my freshman year of high school. This tells you all you need to know about the stability of one program and the lack-there-of of the other. NP leads 46-45-9. This is the second longest high school football rivalry in Ohio behind Massillon-McKinley.

This week was always my favorite in high school. But when I was in high school we only had one winning season (frosh year, 7-3) so the game was just about having a good time and trying to pick fights with Dover kids. NP and Dover are right next to each other so needless to say vandalism and craziness is the flavor for the week. This doesn’t happen in the Mass-McK rivalry because those towns are about twenty minutes apart. In the area this week you have to be 18 to purchase eggs. And the best part of my senior year was that the game was on Halloween so it was twice as nuts. My buddies and I skipped our own bon fire that year so that we could hit Dover players with eggs as they went to their cars after their own bonfire. It was great. I’ve always said that my years in college were far beyond those I spent in high school, but I’d relive that week over and over if I could.

I drove a car in high school that we affectionately called the Bronze Bomb. It in fact was a bronze 1983 four door Buick LeSabre. A tank in Lehman’s terms. It didn’t look like a student’s car. So while my car was parked on the street between Hondas and Cavaliers near NPHS it went untouched while others were covered in egg. And its hefty 307 V8 made getting away from Doverites all the easier. God what a great car. My mom sold it for $400 when I was a junior in college. Considering we bought it for $850 and it had about 150,000 miles on it when it was all said and done I think you could call it a great buy. Very plush seats. I took many a nap in that car while I was skipping class.

That’s enough reminiscing, I’m out.

Come on Mega Millions!

For any of the 3 people that read this (that is an overestimation) you know that I basically stick to writing about sports. Sports are the one thing in my life that keep me sane and give me something to look forward to. Today I’m going to change things up and splice in some of the other things that are going on in my life.

My wife and I are planning on going to Ohio to see our families for Thanksgiving. Great right? Wrong. I honestly dread going “home for the holidays” because you can’t please everyone. Both of our parents are divorced so there literally isn’t enough time in the day. Now here is the Thanksgiving plan as I understand it.

Thursday (T-giving day)-Spend it with her family. Frankly I have no problem with this because I know that it will involve getting drunk and watching football, just like Christmas day.
Friday-Family picture with her family as a Christmas gift for her grandparents. I have no problem with this. But when is it scheduled? It’s going to take forever because the family is big.
Saturday-Graduation party for her older brother who is graduating from WVU. Once again no problem here. But as you’ve seen her family time is definitely monopolizing the trip.
Sunday-Last day, try to be on the road back to VA by noon. It’s about a seven or eight hour drive.

I really like seeing my family. My Dad’s side is easy because much like me he is rational and understands things. If we are only able to spend a few hours with them he’ll understand and he’ll be happy to see us. It’s my Mom’s side that gives me headaches. She is the total opposite of my Dad (I really don’t know how they were ever married, much like my wife’s parents). If I can only commit a short stop, that won’t be acceptable to her and we’ll fight and she'll try to guilt trip me. I love my Mom, but she frustrates the hell out of me.

I’m frustrated with my life. More like I’m frustrated with my career. My wife and I both graduated from college. Yet here I am almost three years past graduation and we are still living paycheck to pay check. I like where I work, I like the people I work with. But I hate selling and I hate the fact that you don’t make dick working in minor league baseball. I got to thinking about what would happen if my wife got offered a good paying job in another area. Would I be able to find a job? My last non-sports job was working part time for Sherwin-Williams in college. My dream right now is to hit the lottery. I’m really convinced that that’s the only way we’re going to get out from under all of this debt.

I’m the assistant coach for a youth flag football team. Five to seven year olds so we don’t exactly run what you would call a wide-open offense. We have some good athletes on the team and they have been improving on offense. But we can’t stop anyone on defense basically because none of the kids can locate the ball. And when they do they can’t get the flag. So tonight at practice I’m going to install what I’m calling a “wide-open defense”. No one is going to be within five yards of the line of scrimmage and everyone will be spread out. We get hammered when a kid reverses his field or a team runs an end around on us. Hopefully this will help. Grant it I can’t make them grab a kid’s flag, but hopefully this will help with finding the ball.

Am I the only one that thinks Air Force Coach Fisher DeBerry’s comments have been blown way out of proportion? He basically said that the AF Academy needs to recruit more black kids because they run faster. Well isn’t that the truth? Every coach in America knows it. I hate how sensitive our society has become. You can’t say anything about race, gender, religion, or sexual preference without it becoming a three-ring circus. I read last week that I high school marching band had to stop playing “Devil Went Down to Georgia” because it was a public school and some parents complained that this violated the separation of church and state. When I have kids I’m going to go to every PTA and school board meeting, and every time one of these idiot parents says something I’m going to punch them in the face.

The problem is that kids aren’t exposed to things the way kids were when I was growing up. When I was growing up my parents were divorced so there were a lot of days that me and my sister came home and were there by ourselves for a couple of hours. I was in like 4th grade. If that happened now the parent would be thrown in jail for neglect. People need to figure out that you need to let a kid experience things so that when they get older they can make good decisions without consulting you.

This year’s World Series was the closest sweep in the history of sports. The worst part of this series is that it was only four games. If the Astros had gotten some clutch hitting and stretched it to seven games this could have gone down as one of the greatest World Series ever.

Sometimes I get a little depressed and only one thing cheers me up; Robot cartoons.

Scrap the Series

Could Phil Garner be the worst big game manager this side of Grady Little? Not to say that he has cost the Astros the last two games, but he has made some very questionable decisions.

Game 2: Former Danville Brave Jermaine Dye gets “hit” on the forearm by a pitch with two outs in the 7th inning. This loads the bases for Paul Konerko. Instead of bringing in one of the best closers in the game who has routinely worked two innings in the playoffs, Garner brings in Qualls. Now Qualls has been solid, but he’s no Brad Lidge. Would it have really been that much of a stretch for Lidge to get one more out? There’s not that big of a difference between two innings of work and two and a third. As we know Konerko hit a grand slam off of Qualls.

Game 3: Chris Burke on third is the winning run, Craig Biggio on first with one out and ROY candidate Willie Tavares coming to the plate in the bottom of the 9th. Now I know that Tavares has been hot in this series, but he was 0 for 4 going into that at bat last night. And did I mention that Tavares is one of the fastest and best bunters in baseball. Why was Garner not squeezing? Burke can fly too. Now grant it Tavares did pop up a bunt attempt earlier in the game, but you have to bunt here. As soon as he swung at the first El Duque offering I knew he was going to strikeout. Biggio had walked on four straight pitches. You never swing at the first pitch in that situation. Berkman is intentionally walked and Morgan Ensberg strikes out. White Sox win in 14. Nice job Scrap Iron.

Real quick. I won’t be surprised if the Browns lose to the Texans this week. They always lose to a winless team sometime after week three. The last two years it’s been Cincy. The offense is terrible. Our defense has been solid, but isn’t the type to score you 14 points in a game.

Bowling Green got waxed 45-14 by Western Michigan Saturday. Omar Jacobs got hurt in the first quarter and didn’t return. I guess that’s how important he is. That and our defense is horrible. To save some face WMU does have a good QB and a really good WR.

What about casual Friday?

This is going to be quick. I just wanted to put my two cents in on the NBA’s new dress code. I’m continually amused by the 5% of the players that are publicly bitching about this. Let’s face it, guys like Iverson just won’t abide and they’ll just pay a weekly fine. That’s what it’s going to come down to.

I think that this is going to cause more entertainment than anything else. Ron Artest has already said he’s going to breaking out suits that would make Harry and Lloyd proud (he’s even promised velvet and suede) and Captain Cool himself, Greg Ostertag, said that he doesn’t even own a sport coat so he’s going to buy one off of a guy on the street. You know that he’s going to be sporting some sweet plaid jackets this season.

And one last thing, Marcus Camby should be roundhouse kicked in the face for saying that players should get a clothing stipend to buy suits to fit the dress code. Isn’t the league minimum over $400,000? I’m pretty sure that everyone can afford a decent suit. I know that NBA assistants don’t make that much, but they seem to be doing all right.

Pitchers do Field the Ball

More random thoughts on the world of sports. That’s really all I know how to do.

I meant to write about this earlier in the week. But during either game four or game five of the ALCS Garrett Anderson came up to the plate and hit a come backer to the mound and was thrown out by a large margin at first base. Tim McCarver (Fox’s resident genius), makes a comment along the lines that Anderson’s grounder couldn’t slip through the infield because the White Sox had put the Ted Williams shift on. Did he not just watch the same play that I did? The pitcher fielded the ball. I don’t claim to be a baseball genius, but I’m pretty sure that the pitcher has to be on the mound for every pitch. If I’m wrong, please correct me. Chalk up another one on McCarver’s board.

I thought that Lou Piniella was kind of annoying in the booth, but when McCarver is already there you really can’t go much farther. And it bothered me how every time Lou would make a comment that he would direct it towards “Timmy.” For one, this isn’t little league, there are no Timmys, and second I didn’t like the fact that it felt like he and McCarver were seeing how long they could freeze out Joe Buck before the producers got in their ears and told them to let him talk. It kind of reminded me of the job website commercials where the guy is working in the office with all of the chimps.

My favorite part of Lou being in the booth was that every time he spoke I imagined Endy Chavez sitting right next to him in the booth, each of them in a dead stare with each other. That stare down will never end.

Bill Simmons's article today was about him being ringside at the Contender rematch fight on Saturday. I could really care less, I didn’t watch the fight and only watched one episode of the show because the Simpsons weren’t on that week. But in the article he talks about his dogs and how they fight. I was laughing out loud. Dog’s play fighting is always funny.

There’s also an article on ESPN.com today about the Golden State Warriors and their playoff potential this season. Chris Mullin wants to be a run and gun team like the Suns were last year. Awesome, I wish that every team would disregard defense and just run the entire game. I really do. The Warriors have the point guard to do this in Baron Davis (if he stays healthy) and they have the ridiculously athletic swingman they need in Jason Richardson. They’ve got decent outside shooters in Mike Dunleavy, Michael Pietrus, Derek Fisher, and even throw in Troy Murphy. But to me the one thing they lack is that guy to fill the middle and finish in the half court. They’ve got Adonal Foyle, if that’s anything to be proud of. And while Murphy is a double-double machine, he’s not the dominating force that Amare was for the Suns last season. Now they did draft Ike Diogu who I really like, but he’s a rookie and who knows how he’ll adjust. Now as much as I’m all for running and gunning, I think it’s a little to early to be donning these guys “this year’s Suns”. I think they’ll be fun to watch and will be in the playoff hunt, but they’re in a tough conference. And when you toss the T-wolves and Lakers back into the mix this season, it’s going to be even tougher.

As I was reading this article and it mentioned Dunleavy and I wondered if there was someone else the Warriors could have drafted that would be helping them more. I think that Dunleavy is a nice player, but 13ppg from the #3 pick in the draft could be considered a little weak. So I looked at who else was taken in that draft and what I found was astounding. That 2002 draft could have the worst 2-8 picks in the history of the NBA. This was the draft that Yao Ming went #1.

#2 Jay Williams-motorcycle accident, is trying to make a comeback this year
#3 Mike Dunleavy-has been improving
#4 Drew Gooden-maddingly inconsistent, as a Cavs fan it drives me nuts. Plus the fact that he was with three teams in his first 2 seasons says something
#5 Nikoloz Tskitishvili-possibly the worst top 5 pick ever, but he was great in workouts
#6 Dajuan Wagner-I’ve covered my feelings for this pick in a previous post
#7 Nene-the lone exception in this group
#8 Chris Wilcox-all of his physical skills obviously don’t get him as many points or rebounds as they did at Maryland

You can’t really blame the GMs who took these guys because they all looked great on paper and in workouts. They’re just busts, there’s no way around it.

That’s it, I got nothin’.

"Look at that scoreboard now, Grasshopper"

Couldn't you see Pujols saying that to Ausmus as he crossed the plate last night?

Last night’s Cardinals/Astros game was one of the most exciting games I’ve ever seen. Even after Berkman hit that homer to put the Astros up I didn’t feel like the Cardinals were done. They’ve just had too good a season and have too many character guys on that team to not at least get the series back to Busch.

I have one question for Tony LaRussa. According to that idiot Steve Lyons, LaRussa basically said before the game that Berkman was the one guy in the Astros lineup that the Cardinals couldn’t let beat them. Then how did he almost do it? I’m sure it has something to do with the fact that you could hit a pitching wedge into the Crawford Boxes. There won’t be any cheapies for the rest of the series.

Pujols’s homer was such a bomb. Everyone knew that ball was gone as soon as it left his bat. And his reaction was one for the ages. He just looked like he was telling all of the Astros fans to shut the fuck up. And they did. You could have heard a pin drop in that place. Lidge brought that on himself. How does he walk Edmonds in that situation? They showed the graphic that Edmonds was 1 for 13 lifetime versus Lidge. And its not like it was battling walk where Lidge threw ten pitches; he walked him on a 3-1 count.

I can really feel for the Astros fans. To be so close and lose like that is heart wrenching. The only thing they can really hang onto is that it was only Game 5. I wrote yesterday that I thought that the Astros were playing like a team of destiny. That one swing last night may have changed everything. As Bill Simmons said, that was “a stomach punch” game. And it’s very hard to recover from a stomach punch.

Pujols is a very underrated defensive first baseman. I thought that the plays he made last night in the bottom of the 9th were both very solid. Both of those balls were very hard hit, but he made the plays look routine. If Tavares gets on to start that inning things could have gotten a little bit interesting with his speed.

I’d be very surprised if this series doesn’t go seven games. I’m MLB’s happy. If the Astros would have won last night there wouldn’t have been any baseball until the start of the World Series on Saturday. Talk about losing national momentum. And I know that there’s always talk about how players are overpaid, and I agree with that to a point, but think about the economic impact that Pujols had on the Cardinals organization and the city of St. Louis with that one swing. There will be a lot of money made by the Cardinals because of that one swing.

Wild Wonderful College Football

Saturday was quite possibly the most exciting college football day in my lifetime. With the exception of the OSU/Miami Fiesta Bowl, of course. The day started with me screaming at the OSU offense to get their shit together against Michigan St. The blocked kick at the end of the first half and John L. Smith subsequent blow up totally shifted the momentum. But it still took a 14-point 4th quarter from the offense and a great 4th quarter from the defense to win it. Thanks to MSU’s secondary for being so awful.

At this same time the Wisconsin/Minnesota game was going on. This game was very tight down the stretch, just like the battle for Paul Bunyon’s Axe should be. After the OSU win was in hand I flipped over to this game. If you’re Minnesota how do you have a special team’s breakdown like that at the end of the game? If they get that punt off the game is basically over because everyone know that Wisconsin can’t throw the ball consistently to save their lives.

At this same time Ole Miss was giving Bama all they wanted and then some. I flipped over to CBS just in time to catch Bama lining up for the winning field goal. Team’s that make runs need games like that to test their grit. Bama clearly didn’t have their A-game on offense but their defense kept them in it.

At this point in the day I’ve seen parts of three pretty fantastic games, so I’m happy if the day ends right there. But it doesn’t. The Notre Dame/USC game was one of the best games ever. A game that truly lived up to the hype. Charlie Weiss is as good a game planner and play caller as there is any where (college or pro). Reggie Bush carried the Trojans and it was clear that ND didn’t have an answer for him. On the other hand I thought that Brady Quinn was great. He hit his throws for the most part and showed me more scrambling ability than I thought he had. But I really give credit to ND’s defense. Up until the long pass to Jarrett on the last drive they contained SC’s passing attack. Just an all around great game.

While I did watch this game from wire to wire, every commercial had me flipping over to my ABC regional game, WVU/Louisville. UL was up 24-7 going into the 4th, and all of a sudden WVU makes a couple of plays and its 24-17. They got it into overtime, three of them in fact. And managed to hold UL on the two-point conversion that would have tied the game in the 3rd overtime. Awesome come back, but a huge bust for the Big East. They’re in the same boat as they were last year. Their BCS rep will have three, maybe ever 4 losses and will get walloped by whoever they play.

So that’s it, right? All the good games are done. No, not quite. Florida State played up the road against UVA. Now I figured with the way UVA has played this season that this would be a walk for FSU. But I think UVA had some karma on their side. They were honoring the UVA team that beat FSU back in 1995. That was FSU’s first ACC loss since the joined the conference in 1990. I really thought that UVA was going to blow it in the second half but FSU’s horrible quarterback made a real bad decision by throwing deep on the last drive and got picked off. Good for UVA. And you just knew that FSU’s bad QB play was going to catch up with them. Play Xavier Lee, at least he could have ran down the field on the last drive.
As much as I hate the Chicago White Sox, I have been pulling for them in the post season. I’m a big believer in rooting for the team that beat you. Since the Sox knocked the Indians out of Wild Card contention I’m pulling for them. I don’t think that I’ve seen a more consistently dominant pitching performance than what they did to the Angels in the ALCS. But honestly I think that the Game 2 controversy affected them more than they let on. Its just like they never recovered and the White Sox knew that they got a break and they were going to make sure they took advantage of it.

Watching the NLCS I get the feeling that the Cardinals are running into a buzz saw. The Astros just look like a team of destiny. I really like the Cardinals team, but an Astros/White Sox World Series would be awesome.

I knew the Browns were going to lose to Baltimore Sunday. The Ravens defense has been roughed up this year so the Browns offense was the perfect pick-me-up for them. Plus the Browns always trip up against down-and-out teams.

I laughed when I saw that Michelle Wie got disqualified from the LPGA event this weekend. I have nothing against her. My only beef with her is that all along she’s been saying that she wanted to stay an amateur so she could go to college and play golf. Well, I guess those millions were just too tempting. Don’t blow smoke up people’s asses, its bad P.R.

Last thing, Hawks center Jason Collier died Saturday apparently from cardiac arrest. Collier was from Springfield, OH and I remember watching him dominate the state Final Four his junior and senior year (1995 & 1996). Now at 7’ anyone should dominate in high school. But he was awesome. He could shoot, handle, and take on triple and even quadruple teams. He was a little soft to play for Bobby Knight, but he was very good at Georgia Tech and was developing into a serviceable NBA player.

Are You Kidding Me?

Braylon Edwards is out 4-6 weeks because of a staff infection IN his elbow. Will the "new" Browns ever catch a break with their first round picks. Everyone of them since 1999 has missed significant time from multiple seasons. Hey Braylon, don't pick at that in-grown hair! I guess that's what you get from a UM guy.

The radio station I listen to at work plays at least three Journey songs each afternoon and each one of them makes my day. Steve Perry is a God.

I was looking at the interns links on Sports Guy's page yesterday and I visited http://www.garygaetti.com/. Awesome! Whoever made the page has a very unhealthy love for the Italian Stallion, but its hilarious none the less.

In my last post I covered the Browns's drafts since their rebirth in 1999. How rich would I be if I had that Sports Almanac? At least a billionare. I'd probably even start one of those bettor's assistance companies like in "Two for the Money". I would stay hot forever though. Today I'm going to consult the Almanac on the Cavs drafts after Jim Paxson took over. Paxson took over for the great Wayne Embry after the 1999 season. Paxson was a horrible GM, you'll see what I'm talking about.

I'm going to start with Embry's last pick in 1999. This wasn't technically his pick because he had already announced that 1999-2000 would be his last season. He pretty much assumed an advisory role and let Paxson run things such as the draft.

1999-Trajan Langdon (are you kidding me); almanac says Ron Artest (I'd have been happy with Corey Maggette or even James Posey. Sidenote, they took AJ Bramlet from Arizona in the second round, solid draft.)

2000-Chris Mihm; almanac says Jamaal Magloire (the worst part of this is they drafted Jamal Crawford then traded him for Mihm. They obviously wanted a big man b/c "Z" was in his broken foot stage. Mihm had a huge second half of the season and vaulted himself into the top 10. Magloire was/is much more physical and could have slid to the 4 when Z got healthy. Looking at that now the Cavs would have one of the best front lines in the NBA when you throw in LeBron. I want to puke.)

2001(my favorite draft)-Dasagana Diop-almanac says take your pick...Richard Jefferson, Joe Johnson, or Zach Randolph (this was by far the worst of Paxson's picks. What made it even worse was that he actually drafted a servicable big man with the 18th pick in Brendan Haywood, only to deal him away to Orlando for Michael Doleac [stiff], and then the Magic sent him to Washington for Laron Profit. The Magic have ruined more drafts than the Cavs, I won't argue that, but this was bad.)

2002-Dejuan Wagner; almanac says Amare Stoudemire (nothing like taking a slashing 2-guard that's all of 6'2" and can't shoot to save his life when one of the most dominating players in the league is sitting their for the taking. At least we weren't the only team to pass on him)

2003-LeBron James; almanac says he finally got one right. No one could have messed up this pick, not even the Magic. (Let it be known that he did squander the 2nd rounder on Jason Kapono with guys like Luke Walton and Kyle Korver on the board.)

2004-Luke Jackson; almanac says take your pick. Jackson probably was the guy at the time. Good size and a good shot, but with all of the high school guys taken after him you know that one of them will end up being a stud (Josh Smith, Sebastian Telfair). It was the safe pick at the time. Paxson did manage to steal Anderson Varejao away from the Magic before the start of the season.

So there you have it. I great run of ineptitude by one of the NBA's worst GMs of all-time. Let's hope that Danny Ferry does a better job.

Is Someone Choking on an Angel?

This is going to run the gauntlet of topics from the last few days.

Alex Rodriguez is going to get blasted for his ALDS (lack of) performance by every media out around. Is it warranted? Indeed. The guy made $26 million this season. He should win the MVP in a season in which he arguably had his greatest all-round season. But then the playoffs came. He hit .133 (2-15) with 0 RBIs, 1 run scored, and 1 SB. And to cap it off he pretty much killed any chance at a 9th inning rally in game 5 by bouncing into a 5-4-3 double play after Jeter led off with a single. Up until that series he was pretty solid in the postseason with a .330 average, but New York’s tough. They’ll ask him “What have you done for me lately Slappy McBluelips?” (I can’t take credit for that nickname, a guy bought the sponsorship for A-Rods page on baseball-reference.com and posted that name. Awesome)

As a Virginia resident I’ve seen quite a bit of ACC football this as it is usually the regional game on ABC. So I’ve seen quite a bit of Virginia Tech. They’re a really good team. Their defense is better than Texas and USC’s, they play Beamer ball special teams, and their offense is on the rise. A Texas-VT Rose Bowl would be a sweet game. I just think that VT’s defense could contain USC. Vince Young is an X-Factor against any team.

Bowling Green beat Ohio this weekend. It wasn’t nearly as close as I thought, 38-14.

Luckily I was in the bag for most of the Ohio State-Penn State game. From what I remember it was ugly. I don’t understand how an offense that has Ted Ginn, Santonio Holmes, Ryan Hamby, and Antonio Pittman can only score 10 points. At some point in that game Justin Zwick should have been given a chance. He may not have the legs of Smith, but he seems to read defenses a little better.

The Browns are 2-2. Their offense was crap for 3 and a half quarters Sunday but the defense kept them in the game. Dilfer hit two big scores to Antonio Bryant in the last 5 minutes. This team just has a different feel to it this year. Since they’ve come back in 1999 they just haven’t won games like that. It’s a nice change.

Do you think the combination of Jose Contreras getting out of New York, reuniting with his wife and kid, and playing with fellow defector El Duque have helped him? I think so.

The new Tampa Bay Devil Rays owner came in and fired pretty much everyone on the player personnel side of the operation. Including Chuck LaMar. Shouldn’t this have happened a long time ago? Here are two examples of why Chuck LaMar was the worst GM in baseball; Jorge Sosa to the Braves for Nick Green, a utility infielder at best. Result, Sosa goes 13-3 with a 2.55 ERA for a playoff team. Green hits .239 with 5 homers. Example #2; Brandon Backe to the Astros for Geoff Blum. What is Chuck LaMar’s obsession with utility infielders. Especially at the price of young arms. It’s moves like this that caused Piniella to stick a gun in his mouth after every game.

Amare Stoudemire is going to miss four months because he just had knee surgery. He says that the knee has been bothering him all summer. Then why the hell did he and the team wait to have surgery until right before the preseason? Is everyone retarded out there? This is the franchise player and now he’s out four months. I know that they have Nash and Marion, but that’s a big load to carry without Joe Johnson and Quentin Richardson.

I read that Emeka Okafor has packed on about 20 pounds of muscle this off-season and was working on post moves with Hakeem Olajuwon. This should scare any team in the Southeast Division (except Miami). If Sean May and Raymond Felton pan out at all this could be a playoff caliber team by the 2006-07 season. Well maybe not, but it could happen. Okafor is the kind of player that can carry a franchise.

While I was looking at A-Rod’s page on baseball-reference.com I noticed that he didn’t win the Silver Slugger for AL 3rd basemen in 2004. Melvin Mora did. That seemed crazy to me, but he had a really good season.

I was thinking about how great it would be to have that Sports Almanac from Back to the Future 2. Not only would I be filthy rich, but I could also change the fortunes of my favorite teams by telling them who to draft/recruit. Now getting into a position to make my opinion count would be a problem, but just bear with me. I’m going to cover the Browns first round picks since 1999.

1999 Took Tim Couch. Almanac says Donovan McNabb
2000 Took Courtney Brown. Almanac says Chris Samuels (you could argue Jamal Lewis,
but I won’t)
2001 Took Gerard Warren. Almanac says LaDanianian Tomlinson (or even Richard
Seymour if they were that hard up for a DL)
2002 Took William Green. Almanac says Ed Reed
2003 Took Jeff Faine. Almanac says…screw the almanac, I’ve always felt that this is the
one pick they got right.
2004 Took Kellen Winslow II. Almanac says DeAngelo Hall (you can’t underestimate the
value of a true lockdown corner)

I’m happy with Braylon Edwards so far. As long as he stops getting staff infections on his elbow.

Clutch

I’m going to say it now and I don’t really care what John Kruk and Harold Reynolds have to say about it. John Smoltz is the best big game pitcher since Jack Morris. I don’t want to hear about Randy Johnson and Curt Schilling. Johnson’s story is more “what have you done for me lately” and while Schilling’s is impressive, I’m going with Smoltz.

Let’s start with Johnson. His career postseason record is 7-8. Now he does have a respectable 3.08 ERA, but his record is under .500. And 5 of those wins came during the D-backs run to the 2001 World Series Championship. Now he was as clutch as anyone in the 2001 Playoffs, but outside of 2 wins in the ALDS vs. the Yankees in 1995 he hasn’t won another postseason start. And isn’t that what defines a pitcher?

Schilling’s puts up a good argument. 8-2 with a 2.06 ERA in postseason games. That’s solid, its downright impressive. And he did fend off elimination in game 5 of the 1993 World Series and game 6 of the 2004 ALCS. He was co-MVP of the 2001 World Series. Ok, Schilling is awesome, and he is very money in the clutch. But I still want Smoltz.

Here’s why. Two reasons. After the playoff loss to Houston last year Smoltz went to Bobby Cox and said he wanted to be back in the rotation because he knew if he had the ball to start the game the team had a better chance to win than if he got it at the end of the game. He, like any good stopper, wants the ball not only when the game is on the line, but when the series is on the line. And the second reason is more philosophical. Go back to Game 7 of the 1991 World Series. One of the greatest games ever played, and it just happened to cap one of the greatest World Series ever. Morris out duels Smoltz in a 1-0 win. And symbolically passes the torch of Best Big Game Pitcher to the next generation.

Smoltz is now 15-4 in postseason play. And has an ERA that is well under 3. He’s a gamer and he always wants the ball. Even in the ‘90s when he was on the same staffs at Maddux and Glavine, Smoltz was the best in the playoffs. Glavine has 12 playoff wins, but he also has 15 losses (even though he was lights out in ’95 vs. the Indians). Maddux has an 11-14 postseason record. Not exactly sparkling.

I will accept arguments for Andy Pettitte (14-8), but Pettitte’s ERA is over 4 which shows that he has benefited from those great Yankees offensive teams.

Pettitte and Smoltz actually pitched against each other twice in the 1996 World Series. Smoltz won Game 1 (6IP, 1R, 4K; AP, 2.1IP, 7R, 1K) and Pettitte bounced back and won Game 5 1-0 (AP, 8.1IP, 5H, 0R, 4K; JS, 8IP, 4H, 1R, 10K). I guess that you could say that Smoltz had the better overall performance in the two games, but in the end pitchers are judged by wins. If Smoltz wins Game 5 the Braves take a 3-2 series lead going back to NY. He lost and the Yankees won in 6.

All-time this is a totally different discussion. To me it comes down to two pitchers, Whitey Ford and Bob Gibson. Whitey’s 10 World Series wins are still the record and stood as the playoff record until the expansion of the playoffs in 1995 and the runs of the Braves and Yankees. He also posted a 2.71 career postseason ERA. Gibson on the other hand just scared the shit out of hitters. Even the old films make you cringe at the swings some of those guys took against him. He only pitched in three World Series, opposed to Whitey’s eleven, so Gibson’s numbers are obviously more impressive. He had a 7-2 record and a 1.89 ERA. He won series MVP twice. And it would have been three if it wasn’t for Mickey Lolich in 1968. Even then Gibson still had a valid argument for the award (2-1, 1.67 ERA, 35K in 27IP, 3CG). Gibson pitched a CG in all but one World Series start, his first against the Yankees in 1964. Ironically Gibson’s two losses came in his first World Series start and in his last. But even in defeat he was great.

This basically brings me to one point. Bob Gibson is the best clutch pitcher of all time. I agree with Harold Reynolds on this one, and I actually said it while John Kruk was slobbering about Jack Morris this morning on Sportscenter.

Here’s my all-time list:
1. Bob Gibson
2. Whitey Ford
3. Christy Matthewson
4. Grover Cleveland Alexander
5. Jack Morris
6. John Smoltz
7. Lefty Gomez
8. Curt Schilling
9. Catfish Hunter
10. Andy Pettitte

Two Days in a Row? I Must Be Sick.

Should anyone really be surprised by Matt Clement's recent performances? This is the same guy that started out like 6-1, maybe even 7-1 with the Cubs in 2004 and finished the season 9-13. Not a strong finisher. Everyone is talking about how he hasn’t been the same since he played Carl Crawford’s liner off of his head, but honestly he’s done this for about the last 3 or 4 seasons. There’s a lot of explanations for this. He doesn’t work out on his own in the off season; he dog’s it during Spring Training; or my favorite, he sits on his ass snorting whip-its and eating Twinkies all off season. And hell, maybe he misses it so much that he starts doing it again in early August each season.

I hope that Red Sox fans are happy that they chased Mark Bellhorn out of town. Yeah he was having a let down season, but what the hell did you expect, its Mark f-ing Bellhorn. The guy had one good season in like 2002. And he did play great during the playoff run last season, but you had to accept that what you were seeing this year was the real him. Well anyways, Tony Graffanino is a quick fix that just happened to come to the team and get hot. Honeymoon over, effective in the 5th inning yesterday. I know that Bellhorn isn’t a Gold Glover, but he makes that play. Now the BoSox are down 2-0 with a guy pitching next game that the weather really dictates what kind of game he has. Wakefield will tell you that. He can grip the ball better in certain weather conditions and the ball moves more in certain conditions. Sox fans better be rooting for Wakefield weather or their done. Look for Alejandro Machado to be the starting 2nd baseman next season.

I was pretty excited to see Orlando Cabrera get the game winning hit last night against the Yankees. I always liked this guy, even before I started working for the Expos. He plays with a lot of confidence. And he was a little down this year, but he was hurt some. I think he’s going to have a big post season. Look for him and the guys leftover from the 2002 Angels to pull them through the Yankees series. Playoff experience cannot be underrated in baseball, or any sport for that matter (except maybe hockey).

I know that the playoffs don’t count towards the MVP voting, but for anyone watching last night, Alex Rodriguez lost the game for the Yankees with his glove. He let a fairly routine bouncer eat him up because he took his eye off of the ball. The Red Sox might be down 0-2 but its not because of Big Papi’s bat (.375 in the first 2 games) or glove.

Tim Hudson decided not to show up for his start yesterday against Andy Pettitte. Hudson was uncharacteristically wild. He walked five batters in 6 innings. You don’t expect that from your #2 guy, and you just can’t do it in the playoffs. I was surprised they scored 3 off of Pettitte, and normally that would be enough with Hudson pitching, but obviously not yesterday. The Braves bullpen still looks awful. I don’t know what happened to Chris Reitsma, but he has just lost it. I will be watching the pitching match up tonight, Smoltz versus Clemens. Both of these guys are old, but you know they both are looking forward to pitching against each other. I could see this going along the same lines as Smoltz vs. Morris in 1991. But I would be more than happy for a reverse repeat performance of their duel in 1999 (Smoltz: 7, 3R, 6H, 11K, L; Clemens: 7.2, 1R, 4H, 4K, W).

How long will it take MLB to finalize the Nationals sale? With all of the steroids talk I don’t think that anyone remembers that this is still a team owned by the other 31 clubs. It’s pretty sad that this huge organization can’t get this done. DC proved this season that they can more than support a club, now get an owner so that team can put some players on the field.

The NHL started up again last night. I didn’t watch. And I don’t plan on doing it anytime soon. Bowling Green hockey is about the only puck I care about.

There are some really great commercials on right now. The Burger King ones are great. I didn’t think they could come close to topping the NFL clips with the King in them, but the one with the lumberjack is great. Them log rolling at the end is awesome. But I think that my favorite commercial on TV right now is the Citi one with the D&D (Dungeons & Dragons) guys sitting on a couch giving these two other D&D guys orders on what attacks to use because they are waiting on the game system. Its pretty awesome and it doesn’t get old. I laugh at it every time.

Bowling Green is going to get a game from OU this weekend. Frank Solich has those guys playing at a high level. They could be a really good team once he gets his players in there and establishes his system.

I got nothing.

Am I Taking Crazy Pills?

Just a few observations…

Why is everyone surprised that Daunte Culpepper is struggling? The guy has been spoiled since he became a starter because defenses would role their coverages to Randy Moss. Now he actually has to come to the line and read the defense.

NEWS FLASH!!!

Daunte Culpepper is not a smart man. Do you know why he went to UCF? Because his grades were so awful early on in high school that every big time program backed off. It wasn’t until Culpepper’s junior or senior year (I don’t remember which) that he became academically eligible to play NCAA football.

My hometown team, the Cleveland Indians, choked big time last week. They dropped seven of their last eight games to lose the wild card. They couldn’t hit the ball to save their lives, but the pitching was solid for the most part. I’m going to blame the SI curse. After all Ronnie Belliard was on the cover last week.

LeBron James came out and said that he has never asked out of Cleveland. I’m going to believe him, but I wouldn’t doubt that he told Dan Gilbert after the season that if Gilbert doesn’t get his shit together that he would force a trade. It was good to see a Cleveland owner finally react in the right way. I’m not sure about the new coach, but Danny Ferry was a great hire. I would have much rather seen Michael Redd in a Cavs jersey next season, but Larry Hughes will have to do. I think their biggest signing was Damon Jones. One of the most glaring holes in that team last year was someone that could consistently knock down 3’s. Jones plugs that hole and then some.

The Cleveland Browns have a realistic chance to have a winning record at the end of October. Their schedule is as follows: Bears, @ Ravens, Lions, @ Texans, and then Tennessee the first weekend of November. Now I’m not getting my hopes up because I know that this is the Browns. But they could feasibly be 4-4 when they go to Pittsburgh in Week 10. Is it bad to get excited about your team being .500 half way through the season?

Bowling Green’s offense looked like a basketball team on a constant fast break Saturday versus Temple. Temple’s defense is horrible, but it was still impressive. We left with 9 minutes left in the second quarter with the score 28-0 to go back to the bar.

Bowling Green is one of my favorite places on Earth. Not only are the bars great, but the eating establishments are awesome. I was only up there for basically a day but still managed to eat food from four of my favorite places and do multiple flaming Dr. Peppers at Mugs.

When I was in college me and my roommates used to “gobble” at girls on our way to the bars or if we were driving down the street. We did this because our term for college sluts was “Sausage Gobblin”. Needless to say we revisited the tradition this weekend.

As much as I hate to say it, the Yankees looked good last night. If their starting pitching holds up, I can see them winning the AL again.

I think the Red Sox starting staff resembles the Yankees last year. But what’s worse for the Sox is that their bullpen is in disrepair. I could see the White Sox beating them. But I can also see the White Sox coming down hard after blowing their load in Game 1 of that series.

I really feel like the Braves are going to beat the Astros. No one thinks these Braves have a shot especially against Petitte, Clemens, and Oswalt. Throw in Brad Lidge and they have one hell of a staff. But the Braves have Hudson and Smoltz. Along with the biggest steal of the year, Jorge Sosa, and a bunch of kids in the lineup that aren’t just happy to be there. That’s been their mindset the last couple of years. That fire to win another title had dwindled drastically. Now with this youthful influx the team is rejuvenated. Case in point, after they won the division all of the veteran players said they hadn’t had a clubhouse celebration like that in recent memory. Keep an eye on this series.

My boy Urban Meyer and the Gators got their butts kicked Saturday at Bama. I didn’t get to see the game until it was 24-3, so I really don’t know what happened. All I can say is if they win out they still win the east. But winning out involves winning at LSU and in Jax versus UGA. Not easy, but it can be done. Meyer will crack the whip this week and get them back on track. I don’t think he’s lost a game that bad since his second half debacle against Toledo in 2002, 42-24 (they led 24-21 at half).

I don’t make predictions too often, and I wouldn’t say I’m really going out on a limb here, but Ohio State will kill Penn State this weekend. It’s going to be something like 45-6. Penn State maybe undefeated, and they did beat a decent Minnesota team last week, but they haven’t faced a defense like the Buckeyes. Especially since they had an extra week to prepare. Michael Robinson might be dangerous, but this defense faced Vince Young earlier this year, they won’t be fazed. And look for the Glenville Connection (Troy Smith and Ted Ginn, Jr.) to have huge games.

I start every road trip of significant distance (i.e. driving to Ohio) with Weezer’s Blue Album. It just really sets the tone for me.

Last thing, I won the fantasy baseball league I was in. It’s the first fantasy league I’ve ever won. I ran away with 4 of the 5 batting categories and had enough pitching to hang on. My favorite part of the whole season was the fact that Mark, who finished second to last and probably didn’t look at his after May still managed to have the best ERA and WHIP in the league. With stats like that the Plus Size Models will live on in Fantasy Baseball lore.